Gay Friendly

I have a co-worker that is str8, but he is gay friendly. I mean so much that it freaked me out at first. He truly is str8, has no desire to be with a guy at all. He was married and has two children, his wife died and now is raising the kids by himself.

He said "I would have never known you was gay" "you dont act it but as soon as you open your mouth, I knew right then" I laughed at him for that. I guess I have acted str8 so much that I still do it.

Hes cool cause he has gone to the gay bars here and dance with all the guys, he likes to just have fun. He stands up for gay rights too. I guess he has had many gay friends. I am guessing here. I really dont know. But when he hears news about gays, he gives his input, its always standing up for us. I wish more people was like him. The world would be a much better place.

Str8 Co-work said "Did you hear this song?"

So my Str8 Co-worker comes up to me today and asked, have you heard "I've Kissed a boy". I said no, he said here, he hands me his phone, and plays the video. I fell in love with the song. As soon as I got home, I found it on youtube and then posted it here. Thought you all might like it too.

Gay Teen Graeme Taylor Supports Teacher

Teacher Jay McDowell was suspended for a day for asking two students to leave his class room because they don't believe in gays. The teacher however was wearing a Anti-gay t-shirt and brought up the subject in his class room. I agree with the school board for suspending him. He is the one that opened up the can of worms, but did not know how to handle the opposition.




This 14 year old student stood in front of a school board hearing telling them he supports a teacher. This is not Graeme Taylor's teacher its not even his school.

Graeme has got more courage than most people. Here he stood in front of a school board and he stood in a crowed room. And it was being filmed for the world to see.

I wonder if Graeme Taylor is going to have a future in Public Speaking?

Boy Friend

The main reason for this post, is just to get it out in the open. Open for the entire world to see.
My family knows, and my friends know. Now you know too.
A cousin of Q told her that he is the one that told my father that I was gay. Funny, I told him over 9 years ago in Florida.

I am saying all this, because I think I have found the one.

Yes the one. The one for me. I have been told in the past that if I would just quit looking he would show up one day and sweep me off my feet.

Well that day came back in mid September 2009. I met him online, you know go to the site, check things out, get board, and sign off. I had truly given up on finding him. I was just board and decided to sign on that site. It wasn't even 5 minuets after I signed on that I had a new message. I thought to myself, another spam message. But that was just not the case. We chatted on this site for a little over a month. After that time period, I thought, well it would not hurt just to meet him. I set up a date, simple one, we met at Pondarosa for lunch. We hit it off.

I feel so blessed to have him in my life. He makes me so happy. He is every thing that I thought a guy should be. He has muscles, he has that V look to him. He acts straight. He's my height and green/blue eyes, dark red hair.

I moved to Florida, and now he has moved down here to be with me, I am so happy now.

He just found a job after 3 months of living here. He was here for Wicked Manors. We had a blast. We held hands most of the night. It was great!

omg I did not know you was gay!

I was on facebook the other night, playing bejeweled. When a chat screen popped open. It was a Preachers Kid that I know. We have never talked in chat before. So here out of the blue he hits me up and says: "OMG I did not know you are GAY!"

I sat there looking at it dumb founded. I thought everyone knew. But I remember back when I started my Facebook page, I wanted a page that was "normal". Since my father was one of my friends. I just did not want him to get flack from his Preacher friends about who I sleep with. (its none of their business) (but I know how they gossip)

I sat there for sometime trying to figure out if I was going to lie to him or just tell him the truth. I went with the truth. I said yes I am. Then I asked "how do you feel about it?"

His reply was "no big deal". Then he said "It threw my dad for a loop". I am sure he is going to report back to his dad, and say yep Allen is gay. So I had to add this: I live with two guys, one is an ex-preacher and one is an ex-deacon. He quickly replied do I know them? I said you might know the deacon, but I do not think you know the preacher, he was from a different church.

I had to ask "how did you find out?" he replied "your facebook photo - I want to be just like Barbie. I laughed.

He told me that another Preachers Son just came out of the closet. That did not surprise me at all. I am sure there will be more before you know it. He asked how did your dad handle the news? I said go to my confession and read it. I guess he went to read it cause he signed out of Facebook.

I decided to post this on facebook so that the rest of my friends could know. I need to get it out in the open. I just hope that all the Preachers will leave my father alone. I hope they talk directly to me. We will see.

Falling in Love

I told a friend that I loved him. He looked at me and asked How? I just stood there. I could not even give him an answer.

So here is my answer.

My love for him is deeper than any love I have ever felt for anyone in my life. So how do I explain that. How do you explain a feeling.

• I often want a moment in time with him. Just to look at him. He is so adorable.
• He takes my breath away when I see him.
• I like how intelligent he is.
• His smile makes me smile.
• I like how he slaps his knee when he laughs.
• His height and weight are perfect.
• I like how his brown eyes glow in the sun.
• I enjoy our conversations.
• He looks good all the time.
  
• His 5 o'clock shadow is hot.
• He is someone that I look up too.
• He is my Hero.
• He makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.
• I like it when he is serious.
• I want to hug him and hold him in my arms for hours.
• I would do anything for him.
• If my heart was the only thing that would save his life, I would give him mine.

I honestly don't think I will ever love anyone like I love him.

Confession

I can remember when I realized that I was gay, I was about 8 years old. It was a scary time. I was in the "closet" further than anyone knew.

When I was in my early teens, one year I dressed up as a girl. I had no clue what all went on with this, oh man the makeup and all that stuff. Oh wow, I don't know how they do that every day. But I went to this Halloween Party. I only knew one person there. And he left me standing there, I went and mingled, I ended up hanging with the girls. It was fun. As the party was coming to the end, there was a costume contest. They were picking the best costume. You know I won that hands down. Everyone there except my friend, thought I was a girl.

Christian middle school, is where I learned how to kiss a guy. I was snooping one day and entered this hall way and at the end of it was what I thought was an empty room. As soon as I entered the door, I saw two guys a few years older than me, they were kissing. I just stood there frozen. This I have never seen in my life. When they spotted me, watching them they were upset. They was more angry that someone found out their secrets. They pushed me up against the wall and threatened me, they started to hit me, when I yelled wait, will you guys teach me how to kiss? They were a bit confused. I thought it was the only way out of this horrible situation that I got myself into. I was not a fighter then, I was a skinny boy and scared really bad at that point. They did teach me how to kiss.

At 16 I had to teach myself how to look at guys in public without them knowing I was looking at them. I had to watch their eyes, see where they are looking and then take a quick look. It became an art. I perfected it very well. I also have learned a lot from watching peoples eyes. I cannot tell you how many straight guys, I caught looking at guys. With their wife/girlfriend right next to them. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret.

Gaydar kicks in - I started knowing who was gay around me. It's a feeling, and it is just weird.

At 17 was the point where I actually asked myself if I was gay. I said I cannot be gay. I am a Christian. I am a Baptist Preacher's Kid. I cannot be gay! The Bible says how wrong it was. I became so very depressed that I almost killed myself. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was hard on me.

At 18 two of my friends came screaming out of the closet. I felt more scared then. I didn't want anyone to know that I was gay too. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 19 things started getting back to a norm. I wasn't scared anymore, and I was talking to my gay friends now. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 20 I am fighting myself once again. This time I was depressed to but instead of trying to kill myself, I just cried all the time. I remember one time that my mom asked what was wrong. But I just could not tell her. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 21 my life went nuts. On my birthday, well I went to two bars, first I went out with my straight friends, then I met my gay friends and we went to the gay bar. I danced my night away. I was dancing with hot guys. I was having the time of my life. There was this one night that I was at the gay bar, I saw this guy across the bar, the closer I got, the more he looked like, no it couldn't be. He was a family member of a preacher that I knew. I walked up to him and he was freaking out. I calmed him down, and we talked the rest of the night, mostly about camp, that is where we knew each other from. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret.

At 22 member of the church came to me often and asked when I was going to get married and have kids? I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret.

At 25 I married a girl. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 28 I told my wife I was gay. (she said that explains it) She told me I could look, but never touch. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 33 I told my father I was gay. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 34 my father and I are speaking normal again. My father never stopped talking to me, but it was different. I did not tell him for shock value, I had to tell him, because of his ministry. I didn't want anyone to tell him that I was gay. I wanted it to come out of my mouth. I am in church, learning about god. But I have a secret. I prayed every day to have this demon removed from me. I begged the Lord to remove the feelings, because it was to hard on me.

At 36 I got a divorce. I was ready to be out for once and for all. I tried for 20 years to be straight, to act straight, to think straight, to walk straight, to talk straight, to watch my every move.

At 36.5 I came screaming out of the closet. My screams became very loud, when my ex-wife went to every friend, church member, everyone that I knew, including co-workers and told them I was gay. I am glad she did, it made it easier on me. At least I didn't have to figure out how to tell them. =o)